Ticking Head

Five more days and it's gonna be exactly three years after the incident that changed the way people look at me. Not to forget the way they think about me too. Twenty five stitches on your left eye is no small thing. The pain I had to endure during the stitching procedure was no laughing matter. Yes, you may ask me what about the anaesthetic during the surgery. Well yea, the MO did inject some painkillers into my eye (yes he injected the painkiller INTO MY EYE!) and after like sixteen stitches, he told me that he can't inject any more of the painkillers. The reason? Inject more and my eyeball will pop. Literally! I asked him how many more stitches to go? He answered back saying only five small one to go. I said fine, go ahead. He started stitching my eye back but the five stitches was actually another nine to ten more. The last five stitches was no longer painful cause my skin got numb and I got tired of the pain since my anger started kicking in back. Don't ask why cause it's a long story. So long, I can't remember it's detail very well. =(

The pain was the short term effect but the scar is the long term effect of my action I'll have to live with the rest of my life. I thought the scar was all the side effect was but now I found out another long term side effect. Memory lost. Not a serious one. When I say not a serious one, I meant not the Ghajini type or Memento type. I start to forget minor stuffs. I forget stuff I say two seconds ago. Minor stuffs like that. That I can life with.

I thought the pain was gone and will not return. But again I was wrong. I sense my head ticking. Not migraine but headache. The feeling of heaviness all the time. The feeling of something ticking inside my head. These feelings aren't something you can enjoy. If it's pain, then I can deal with it but this is more like annoying. Irritating feeling. For the past month, it got worst. More often and more annoying. I decided to visit the doctor. She told me your stressed up. I? Stressed up? Lol. But for the safe side and to increase the hospital revenue, the advised me to take a CT scan. Fine. The radiology department guys gave me an appointment on the tenth of June. Great! Now I'll have to wait till June. But I guess it was for good since the CT scan would cost me some 350 bucks. *sigh*

They gave me some strong painkillers since Panadol wouldn't work for me. Now, I'll have to either change my workplace or change my working time. Great! My boss is gonna kill me!